DECEMBER DIARY PAGE 1 – The Haemin Sunim Impact

“I wish I'd had the courage 
to live a life true to myself, 
not the life others expected of me.”

Haemin Sunim. This name has been ringing a bell. One of my dearest friend has got me introduced to this man of great honor. I haven’t read his book – THE THINGS YOU CAN SEE ONLY WHEN YOU SLOW DOWN: HOW TO BE CALM IN A BUSY WORLD. But luckily, some excerpts of this wonderful book have come my way; one again with timely help offered from my dearest friend. 

Picture Courtesy: Google

I therefore wish to dedicate this blog to the various things, I learnt from the excerpts; now available with me. 

Excerpt #1

When someone tells you, “No,”
don’t react emotionally and lose control. 
“No” may open up a surprising new world to you.
“No” may unexpectedly lead you to good people. 
If you begin to push against the unchangeable “No,”
you will suffer in the process and miss other opportunities. 

The above paragraph made me look back at 2019 and the many years prior to that. I was reminded of all the testing times, when a ‘No’ or a series of multiple ‘Nos’ came my way. I did exactly the opposite of what Haemin Sunim has gently advised us not to practice. 
Am I feeling terrible about it? Initially I did. But, I read the lines, a few more times. The core of the message, Haemin wants to put across kept getting clearer. His DON’T is not conveying a negative message. His Don’t is drenched in positive vibes and somewhere he is trying to tell us, “let that NO come our way.” Only reminding me of another lovely suggestion made by another good friend of mine, who had one said, “Be in acceptance. Question everything. Expect nothing.”

Excerpt #2

The world will keep turning even without you.
Let go of the idea that your way is the only way,
that you are the only one who can make it happen.

In simple words, Haemin has said something, which has time and again been the reason of all the stubbornness within me. The world is going to go with the flow. Even if I were to stand like a wall, there are forces which will make a breakthrough. I took some time to accept, I am a human being; I am a small particle of this universe. I am element, which is filled with energy. And I am not the only one to make a million things happen. My way exactly might not be the only way. The heart did break at reading this. But I recovered faster because of the reality these three lines reflect of.

Excerpt #3

Do not lament that the world has changed.
Do not resent that people have changed.
Evaluating the present through the memories of the 
past can cause sadness. 
Whether you like it or not, change is inevitable.
Embrace and welcome it.

So far, I kept sharing the same quote – CHANGE IS THE ONLY CONSTANT. But these lines have put that very CHANGE on a very different pedestal. It is a bitter reminder of the many times, I have settled down for breakfast on the dining table. My mom has sat across me and I have definitely evaluated the present through the memories of the past, which has caused sadness, anger, frustration, bitterness and negativity. I know, I can’t like everything. But that everything is also that something, which needs to be embraced. But the medium, I guess might be different or the strategy to embrace might need a re-look.

Excerpt #4

The person leading you toward spiritual awakening
is not the one who praises you or is nice to you.
Your spirituality deepens because of those
who insult you and give you a hard time.
They are your spiritual teachers in disguise.

For the last twenty years, I have met innumerable spiritual teachers in disguise. I may hate to call them teachers. But from them, I feel I have learnt to take the path to make new forays into unexplored zones. I got bruised. I bled. Somehow, I learnt to survive and continue with what I am today or where I wish to be tomorrow. 

Excerpt #5

Life is like a theater. You are assigned a role.
If you don’t like the role,
keep in mind that you have the power to re-create the
role you want.

This path is not a smooth one. There is gunpowder in the air. From a distance, I can smell something insanely bitter. Yet, I won’t step back. I’ve made that move; to re-create the role, I want.

On November 23rd, Haemin Sunim tweeted: 

A part of you that is imperfect or broken can motivate you to work hard to overcome it and can ultimately bring you success in life. Do not despair over what is imperfect in yourself. Instead, look at your flaws with love. #LoveforImperfectThings

If I sit down to count my series of flaws, I may end up tagging them ‘infinite’. But I haven’t look at my own flaws with love. Most of the times, they have been brought to my notice by others. I have started noticing them very recently. Since love wasn’t the way in which I tried looking at them, I always felt, there might be something, which is missing in here.

On October 11th, Haemin Sunim wrote something absolutely phenomenal:

Do not beg for people’s attention. As you discover and develop your unique strengths, they will pay attention to you automatically. #LoveforImperfectThings

Of late, I have seen people try many tricks to seek attention of others. These tricks left me broken emotionally and hampered my emotional intelligence. So, I developed my own unique strengths. The desired attention did come my way. But, there was no dearth of jealousy and unkind temperament around these strengths. I chose to read what Haemin Sunim wrote. I read it again and again. Perhaps this habit of repetitive reading somewhere ended up answering one of the most important questions of my life.

As I conclude, I wish to thank my friend Sia for making me aware of Haemin Sunim; his book and of course the many ways in which, he inspires, motivates and stimulates our minds. 

Picture Courtesy: buddhistdoor.net

It’s high time, life takes a front seat and all other nonsensical stuff take a backseat. 

So, until I write/ blog/ publish/ share something new in the coming days, I wish to quote Haemin Sunim again - Do you know the biggest regret of the dying? “I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” Are you walking on the path true to yourself?

I guess, that question, which he asked should answer everything that we could be struggling with. 

- Virtuous Vociferous | December 08 | December Blog-1 | Never Settle | 2019

NEWTON’S THIRD LAW OF MOTION

Right now I’ve constrained myself to remain unaffected by the sight of the well-made bed. I simply wish to avoid the temptation of sleep, the reward of leisure and the bonus of pleasure. The Sunday is bound to die soon. Monday will follow like a rude beast of sorts. Therefore sleep should be the first thing on mind. Somehow I think, today I will succeed in postponing it; provided Newton doesn’t interfere.

Is something bothering me? Well, of course something is! Or else I wouldn’t have been spending this time, patiently thinking and writing these words. I am wondering and trying to choose between two sides of my life as a professional, a creative writer and a creative director. What are these two sides all about?

Side #1 – Should I turn a blind eye towards non-performers and embrace ignorance?

Side #2 – Is it OK to act like a coward and secretly keep praying to save the job?

If given a choice, I wish to abolish both. Seventeen years of my tough career in advertising have taught me certain principles; one of which is – Seeking Clarity. Even though I stuck to it like a dictum; in the last five years, I haven’t stressed on it firmly. As a result, a not so rare breed of unthinking client servicing executives seems to have taken undue advantage of the same. Rather than blaming them or holding them responsible, I wish to plead guilty. A certain guy called Sanjay Mukherjee spoilt me to the core. His was a personality of a hardcore client servicing executive who easily brewed an infectious blend of passion, persuasion, precision and presentation. How could that idiot never walk out without impressing or winning the client’s approval? Some say, he was blessed. But I don’t believe them. I cursed him every time because he drove me crazy with his ambition to achieve. Bloody hell, I succumbed so easily that I am yet to recover from that process of winning. Circa 2017, I am struggling to make the nonbelievers in good advertising to still seek the bigger purpose of creative communication. Shame on me!

I feel more ashamed because I read from the Bhagwad Gita every morning. Why does it time and again remind us to expect no gratification from our deeds and continue slogging? I feel ashamed because I memorize the line, extend it further by adding ‘never expect anything from anybody’ and I still fail on all counts. I start demanding answers. I start seeking results for the hard work I put in by setting my ass, my mind on fire. It sucks even more when the responsible act irresponsibly, choke the communication network to death and come running towards me to announce – ‘Taking a note of the caused delay in delivering, the client has sent a stinker’. I own up to the discrepancy and deliver. Suddenly the client seems to be in no hurry and the conveyor of the stinking news starts showing withdrawal symptoms. I start demanding answers again. I betray my own learning from the Bhagwad Gita – Continue delivering. Expect nothing. When none of these work, I voluntarily decide to rest my case and lose my cool. This is where Newton’s third law of motion jumps in.

I feel more ashamed because I read from the Bhagwad Gita every morning. Why does it time and again remind us to expect no gratification from our deeds and continue slogging? I feel ashamed because I memorize the line, extend it further by adding ‘never expect anything from anybody’ and I still fail on all counts. I start demanding answers. I start seeking results for the hard work I put in by setting my ass, my mind on fire. It sucks even more when the responsible act irresponsibly, choke the communication network to death and come running towards me to announce – ‘Taking a note of the caused delay in delivering, the client has sent a stinker’. I own up to the discrepancy and deliver. Suddenly the client seems to be in no hurry and the conveyor of the stinking news starts showing withdrawal symptoms. I start demanding answers again. I betray my own learning from the Bhagwad Gita – Continue delivering. Expect nothing. When none of these work, I voluntarily decide to rest my case and lose my cool. This is where Newton’s third law of motion jumps in.

To conclude, the fearless mind that I have been born with and the restless soul that I will continue being, I believe my action will definitely lead to reactions. Will that stop me from causing ruckus? Will I stop demanding answers? Will I decide to act like a coward? Or simply raise my voice and allow Newton’s third law of motion to take over! I think only when the apple falls; the issues concerning me will gain some gravity. Till then, I shall rebel.

-Virtuous Vociferous

BACK TO THE RUINS OF APATHY, ANARCHY AND ANXIETY

A junior designer who became a Copywriter.

A Copywriter who became Manager of Corporate Communication.

A Manager who stepped down and stepped up to become a Senior Copywriter.

A Senior Copywriter who became a Senior Manager of Content.

A Senior Manager of Content who became a Creative Lead.

The Creative Lead who was pushed back to become a mere Copywriter.

A Copywriter who will defy nonsense henceforth because he deserves to continue as a Creative Lead.

I am slightly or maybe completely inspired by the legendary quote from the forever favourite flick – GLADIATOR. Also on very few occasions, I’ve been this vocal about my feelings and opinions about situations that I am surrounded with.

To make a beginning, Diwali holidays are over. I am not ashamed to reveal that I was very much pleased to remain detached from work, for the whole of four days. No phone calls. No ugly smses. No negative competition. Absolutely at peace with loved ones. The same loved ones, who wait for hours to see me return from the workplace. But I don’t return. How do I return because there are some blind people around me, who only open their eyes to see me depart and never see me enter! They don’t have a life of their own because they remain immersed in fake show-offs.  

Therefore there is a specific reason why I started with the first few lines, which are (honestly speaking) heavily inspired from Gladiator. Time and again, I watch that movie whenever it is telecast on satellite channels. Or I browse through YouTube to hunt for specific moments from within the movie, which make me feel of being in a virtual coliseum; fighting to sustain my identity. I won’t say my identity is under direct threat. But I would say, it is being challenged from wrong quarters of uncreative mind-sets. On an everyday basis, I’ve to deal with the constant insult of making some jugheads understand that creativity is not a fly-by-night process.

The story began somewhere around four months back. Seated in a glass cabin, facing the reception and cross examined by two men; it was the same me replying positively. After a brief moment, they demanded that I make a presentation and show it to them to decide; if I was worth it. After ten years of being in the creative sphere, such things don’t deter me anymore. I spent a good sum of one hour or a little more than that to put together a presentation. One of the men from the odd strongbox of two or three man team sat across the table and explained how the presentation has to be upmarket to be presented to the CEO. I complied and made it look more presentable, more appealing and more promising.

The remark ‘Good Job’ was the first trump card to pull me in. I was guided to a CEO’s cabin. The darkness within should have been a clear indication of a nasty path ahead. But I paid no attention. Speaking to the CEO should have been a pleasant experience. But there was something he said in Hindi – Humein achey logon ki zaroorat nahi hai. Achcha bankar kya karoge, HELAAOGE? (We are not in need of nice people. By being nice, are you going to shake it?) For a moment, I was amused as to who was I speaking to! Is this how a CEO speaks to a prospective Creative Lead? Is this how you get introduced to a person of higher repute on your first meet? I still paid no attention. Many temptations, fake promises and high hope later; I gave in to what they showcased. Having set their second trap, they succeeded in pulling me into the game.

The game was well planned but with evident loopholes. My introduction was colder than North Pole. A negative image of a hardworking team was painted. For the first three months, I didn’t know that there was a fresh thinking and hardworking copywriter in our team. Fake stories were seeded in as to how history was created. To be honest, at a place with wrong geographical thinking; even the immortals can’t create history. The incessant tale of wanting to change some old habits continued to do the rounds. I continued respecting everything that came my way. But there was more to come. I soon realized that I had stepped into a wax museum of illusions. For all the so called creative work that came our way, there were no proper briefs ever shared. At a point of time wherein we were talking of Social Media, we were talking of media that we didn’t understand or bother to evolve with. We were making commitments to clients that were not even considered for a slide in the PowerPoint presentations, we made.  Time started seeping away. Luckily I established a connection with the same team that was painted as criminal minded. The more I started working with them, the more I realized about the body of lies that was roaming around me; nude and ferociously. Every time this body broke for a smoke, I felt relieved.

The epidemic of late nights came striking hastily. Every single task was tagged urgent or crucial to sustain the business. Work suddenly swelled without a reason. Our minds started turning obese with bad ideas. The clients we started dealing with had their own set of ideas in place. We agreed to start executing them. Never was the team once consulted about it and neither me, the Creative Lead was consulted ever. The story continued at a bitter pace. New characters started jumping in. The walk-ins of new characters fuelled the already derailed structure of work. We welcomed those who knew nothing about creative process. This was a new breed. This new breed screamed on whatsapp, faked on facebook, lied on twitter and ran away with all the credit of good work. They decorated their eyes with fake tears during moments of our personal triumph. They patted our backs with filth in their hands. The murk continued. Briefs stopped coming in. We were called by the clients to be insulted. One man took the onus to put up a show, which held promises of being a gala flop. This man is the recent mismanaged man on mission. Every time he held a meeting, his opening line for that moment would be – I CAN’T TRUST MY TEAM. If he somehow managed to be in a good mood, he would vomit saying – YOU AS A TEAM HAVE YET NOT CONVINCED ME TO WIN MY TRUST. If this is how you are supposed to talk during meetings and boost the confidence, then I think this man never had worked with a team or known the word – LEADERSHIP. More murk continued. Till a day arrived when everyone gave up and took the issue to people, whom they thought will do justice and liberate them from tough times.

Along with others, I too chose to speak in high decibel. From within, a voice prompted – YOU WILL BE FRAMED AND THE TEAM TOO WILL STAND TO SUFFER. But then bad habits never die soon. The mutiny continued. I didn’t speak as a torn individual soul. We spoke as a team and as one soul of many torn souls brought together. We waited for hope until despair knocked on our doors.

A new story is in the making. The grey characters are having fun with all the vibrancy around them. Evil has taken over the good. And as opined by the CEO - Achcha bankar, we are or maybe I am heelaofying (We or I in particular are shaking it by being nice). But like all bad times, the good times of Diwali arrived. All the negative moments seemed temporarily erased. But then Diwali is not celebrated for 365 days. It’s celebrated for just four precious days. The other 361 days are yet to be lived, survived and fought out.

To announce an ending, Diwali holidays are over. It is high time to go back to the ruins of apathy, anarchy and anxiety. In the ruins where evil awaits to insult credibility of being what we are – truthful. In the ruins the evil awaits to avenge an insult, we had inflicted on it.

As a sign off, I wish to say this is not something to be called as frustration. But I’ve spoken the truth not considering the future prospects of it. Many might not like it. Many might not understand it. But personally, I feel satisfied to have written something that I think, I should have written long back. I simply hope the avalanche of fake hope stops here and now. And for once, stop hiring people to insult them or their expertise at a fixed monthly wage of peanuts.

-vociferous

PS: Don’t make creative minds commit uncreative crimes to get your torn egos massaged