BACK ON/OFF THE TRACK

I am not a parasite. At the same time, I refuse to be counted amongst the socialites. My identity, my interests, my hobbies and my hesitations belong to me. There is nothing particular or peculiar about me except the fact that I am a creative writer. A writer, who is passionate about life, loves to dream, eat, laugh and travel extensively. And I haven’t yet developed distaste for what I do as a job, as a commitment, as a responsibility and as a breadwinner.

At this moment, what really matters is my presence after a long hiatus. Some might mask the reality by claiming to be bouncing out of hibernation. But I can’t pretend and neither can I lie. Either I myself or my body language shall give out the nude truth – up, loud and volatile. I was on leave for a good span of three weeks. How far it was relaxing is my lookout. How far it was enjoyable is what the world seems to be curious about. The reason definitely was super personal. People are still complaining for not having received invitations. Frankly speaking, I remain unaffected.

The state of mind that I am in, is nonetheless closer to the plight of the protagonist Chuck Noland (beautifully brought alive on screen by Tom Hanks) in Cast Away (released in 2000). All the impending work seems to have been completed. There is no trace of stress in the office. Ugly jokes are being cracked. Some unthinkable categorizations and segregations are fatally visible. Some laughable rules have been implemented. And some unthinkable stringencies promise to be making life of a creative writer even more difficult. It is worth mentioning that facebook also has been blocked to increase productivity, deliverance and of course results. Surrounded by vibrant walls and colorful colleagues, it is worth thinking if taking a leave is lethal or legal!

The level of being lethal or legal stands undefined. In India right from the day you request a leave on basis of a wedding, birth, death, health, work etc; the perceptions towards you stand unaffected. It is the phase after you are back from leave that you realize the world has suddenly changed. The first to hit you straight on your face are your immediate colleagues. They will make you realize time and again as to how during your absence, it was their presence which saved the world from drowning deep in a shithole. Thereafter come the subordinates, the human resource ambassadors and of course the so called superior you report to. The superior is the most interesting character. He or She makes an appearance once in a day. He or She peeps in like a squirrel into the cubicle that we think is our own private world. A smirk on their otherwise avoidable face makes you realize how big of a criminal you are for being on leave. And then arrives a long phase of silence.

The phase of silence is most loved. No work arrives on your desk. To kill time most commit the mistake of checking through the many emails one might have missed checking during the absence. This heinous error should seriously be avoided. In the many emails that one might have missed checking, at least five to seven of them will be forwards of what the clients might have sent for not having met the deadlines. No matter how hard you bang your head on the wall, it won’t break. It is necessary to be remembered that these walls are not just made of bricks, concrete and steel. On the contrary these walls stand strengthened by layers and layers of misunderstandings, gossips, rumors and of course taller than ‘Eiffel tower of Paris’ egos.

At the end of the day, with no work coming your way and staring blankly at the Adam aged desktop monitor most wonder – what made you come back from the leave? Some have the tendency of rushing towards and asking how was the first day after a long leave? Is everything really fine? How does it feel to be bombarded by deadlines? Has anyone informed of a fellow colleague having put down the papers and is life getting back on track? It is only a case with Creative Writers that they wish, they could have explained – LIFE IS NOT BACK ON TRACK BUT THROWN OFF THE TRACK.

-vociferous

Statutory Warning: The produced piece is a work of fiction and is not inspired or influenced by real events. It is neither written out of frustration nor depicted in an irritated tone. It is just a state-of-mind, which needed a wordy justice and I seriously think I haven’t failed in carrying it out to a readable extent.